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Merry Drone Christmas to All and to All a Good Flight

With a warm shout out to Clement Clarke Moore! 

‘Twas the day before Christmas, when across this great land,

Drones were delivering and lending a hand;

I was working my drone job at the ole FAA,

Checking out that drone pilots, our rules they obey;


‘Twas Yuletide, I know, but I stayed here in town,

My task was important, forget the shutdown!


Don’t think I hate drones – it’s quite the contrary,

But I deal in safety, so danger comes rarely;


Armed with my coffee and binders of laws,

I had just settled down to write a new clause;


When high in the airspace, radars sensed a new blip,

I sprang into action, sharp as a whip;


Away to the monitor, I focused my gaze,

To find the rogue aircraft up there in the haze;


The track on the radar soon allowed me to see,

Some descending object, heading right down for me;


Then what to my wondering gaze landed soft on the ground?

But the most wondrous drone I had ever found;


With a sleek design, so rugged yet spry,

I knew right away, ‘twas a new DJI;


More agile than wind, it landed near me,

I dashed forward quickly, shouting federal decrees;


“Now, BVLOS! Now, waivers! Sec. 333!

Part 107! 400 Feet! Now listen to me!”


‘Twas the prettiest drone, that ever I’d seen,

Tricked out with vestments of red and bright green;


As I gawked in amazement, drone magic most grand,

Shot forth a small man, who did quickly expand;


Where once stood a drone, with rotors a-flutter,

Now stood a fat man but know this: I’m no nutter!


He was dressed in pilot gear, from his head to his toes,

His clothes were all tousled, from the flight I suppose;


Despite his method of drone transportation,

He was a traditional Christmas representation;


The way his bright drone sensors did jingle,

I knew this drone lover must be Kris Kringle;


An array of drone products, he had flung in a sack,

Smiling ever so slightly, he began to unpack;


His eyes – oh they shined! His love of drones clear,

He whispered right to me, “I’m so glad to be here;”


“You see, diligent man from the old FAA,

I’ve been watching your progress every night and bright day;


Despite some friction twixt you and drone users,

It’s clear to me, sir, you all hate drone abusers;”


“Making skies safer takes teamwork and skill,

Pilots and agencies can co-write a good bill;”


“But tonight, my dear chap, I came here not,

To deliver a lecture, nor class nor sinister plot;”


“No!” said he, “not to complain nor to nag,

I visit your workplace to give my drone bag!”


And with that, dear Santa, oh he went to work,

Poured out his bag contents with a wink and a smirk;


“So, FAA man,” said he, “Here’s the deal,”

These drone gifts, your Xmas blues surely will heal;


As I gazed at the booty, my eyes full of wonder,

My mouth did water at the splendorous plunder!


Thermal imagers! LIDAR! 4K high-def imagery!,

Software solutions for to gain top-notch telemetry!


Drone doo-dads custom made for some missions,

Farming, construction and detecting emissions;


A bag full of swag for tons of applications,

Mining, utilities, search-and-rescue situations;


And to neutralize the occasional drone ne’er-do-well,

This grim anti-drone gun will shoot them to hell;


And as Santa shrunk down to fit in his drone,

I frowned in my heart that he soon would be gone;


“Don’t look so downcast, he said with great cheer,

Unmanned aircraft technology will make the way clear;”


“I cried out “But Santa there’s much drone bad news!

Drones flying ‘round Gatwick, mixed with ignorant views;”


As his tiny elf body began to wink out,

He cupped hands to his mouth to give me a shout!


“Don’t worry, young man, just do what you should,

Share the message of courage – Drones for Good!


His tiny voice bellowed out as he flew through the night,  

“A Drone Christmas to all and to all a good flight!”

 

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